junk in my trunk...

Transient

ok, i lied, that is NOT my junk drawer. that is martha stewart’s junk drawer. and anyone with a junk drawer that is color coordinated should stab herself with those scissors. which b.t.w. don’t really look like they would hurt anyone. i have much more dangerous scissors in my junk drawer. and they aren’t color coordinated. and i am not afraid to use them...

i am wondering about that copper wiring though. and the tiny little light bulb. mcquiver might be able to fight off a home invasion with those items. BUT with the items in my junk drawer, he could take over the WORLD!!!!

ok and now i have to say that there will be some foul language used in today’s post...

and now i have more interested readers...

but it isn’t bad language if you are a marshall... (i can rationalize ANY sin, just try me...)

see the ONLY bad word that is okay (and only in VERY rare cases) at the marshall house is the word “ass”... 

(someone please tell me that matt’s grandmother, maxine, is not reading this like she read the blog about matt... mrs. g, don’t read this anymore!) 

years ago, when millie was little we were reading a kid version of midsummer night’s dream and it was a british version and in britain the word “ass” is not a bad word. it would be like saying “butt’ here in the states, not a great word, but not a swear word. and i was explaining that to millie because the word “ass” was in the story we were reading and was kind of integral to the humor of the story.

well anyway that next week in sunday school, she told her sunday school teachers that her mom used bad words but it was okay because her mom was shakespearean...

sigh... 

so now i use the word every now and then and say to the kids, “i am so shakespearean”. and it is funny. ha ha. isn’t it funny when mommy sins? ha ha ha... my kids are going to soooo need therapy...

but today i have to use it in my blog because i have been given my epitaph.

all of my life, i have wondered what would be written about me on my tombstone. and i have never found quite the right words that i really want to represent me... BUT NOW, i can die happy.

because my good friend, barry marchman (i am SO outing you with your FULL name on here) has provided me with my epitaph... 

you see, i was teaching a class today at the middle school. the public school middle school where my darling two older children go every day. it was for millie’s 8th grade history class. they have been studying the constitution and ... how to put this nicely... well, the student teacher was not doing a complete job on it...

so i told the regular teacher that i LOVED LOVED LOVED the constitution (which i do) and that i would LOVE LOVE LOVE to come and teach one day. and so today was the day.

and barry had recommended that i read a book that he really liked about the constitution to prep and by golly, i had already read that book (i hate it when barry and i think alike, that is way scary). and so i sent him my copious notes, my activity sheets, my fun pre-quiz, and my teaching outline for the class... i am an over-preparer...

and barry sent me this email back which contains my epitaph...

“I love that you never do anything half-assed.  

Can I say that and still go to heaven?” 

so now i have an epitaph, “she never did anything half-assed” or i also like “she put her full ass into anything she did” or even “she was all ass”. they all kind of sum me up, don’t they? and include a shakespearean word. epitaphic perfection...

anyway the class went GREAT, they all seemed very interested. there were lots of questions and some great discussions.

the thing that really caught their attention was when i showed them what it really was supposed to mean when we talk about political parties and how the founding fathers saw it as a balance of power avoiding both extremes on either side, tyranny or anarchy...

first, i had a nice long line and R and D at the sides of it (d on the left and r on the right) and had them imagine where they would be along that line...

and then i started adding the words “ruler’s law” and “ no law” on the sides and asking what happens in those situations and we got all these other words added...

i am sure there is a lot of hugging going on at the school right now...ooh, maybe i shouldn’t be hoping for that....

well, anyway... i put my whole “ass” in the history class...

i just had to say it one more time. and if barry isn’t going to heaven for saying it once... he and i will have lots of reading time in that other place...