it’s not everyday...

our friends, the hale family, came to town a few weekends ago. seems that once you win an emmy and mention your hometown that you are suddenly a hot ticket for speaking in said home town. who knew? the hales were in town because the FAMOUS friend of my youthful days, tony hale (remember to be nice to your friends and their families because you never know when your best friend’s little pesky brother will grow up TO WIN AN EMMY), talked at fsu to students. one thing he talked with the students about was his children’s book that he has written (archibald's next big thing). i have heard him give his “be content where you are or you will never be content when you get where you want to go” speech before (mostly from my couch as he and i talked about that whole concept because i am mad crazy about that whole spiel) and now i am even more excited about it being in book form. for kids. and adults. and me.

so i think it was one of those “God knows i am the village idiot” moments when what will forthwith and forever be known as my “crocodile lesson” happened the day after they left town because it was exactly like what he was talking about and what i had been thinking about as these same ole, same ole days speed by like a bullet train on speed…

the incident occurred because i am directing the musical at raa performing arts magnet middle school. peter pan. very exciting. very overwhelming. i am very unqualified. yet, i am loving (most) every moment.

i especially loved this one very significant moment…

the boy that we cast as the crocodile had to drop out. it wasn’t a really prime part. the crocodile doesn’t speak. he wears a heavy cumbersome felt costume. an unhip and unflattering crocodile green costume. but our girl who plays the dog part is pretty thrilled with her part as silent (well, barking) animal. so i asked if she would also like to play the crocodile. 

THRILLED, DELIRIOUS, ECSTATIC, RHAPSODIC, CORYBANTIC (really, that is a synonym of “thrilled”) are not strong enough words to describe her response. well, maybe corybantic is, but i have never heard of that word before in my life.

“REALLY?!?!? THE CROCODILE?!?!?!? THAT IS MY DREAM ROLE!!! why did billy drop out?!?!? who would drop out of the BEST PART OF THE PLAY?!?!?” that was her response. at about 185 decibels of teenage excitement (or corybanticness). it was heart warming. i love a gal very into her role. of the non speaking crocodile. anyway, she ended up being so adorable as the crocodile that we included her on a dance number. you should see her can-can kick as the croc. brilliant. 

so on the day that her costume was ready i happened to run into her on campus as she was going into a class. i told her that her costume was ready. her reaction was so blatantly OVER THE TOP/CORYBANTIC that her teacher told her that she could go and try it on IMMEDIATELY because it was evident to all in a 50 mile radius that no learning could take place in her brain until she had tried on that crocodile costume.

so we went and she tried it on. the heavy, unyielding, hot as blue blazes (or should that be green blazes?) crocodile suit. complete with croc hands. a croc hoodie. and croc booties. my costume gal got all up in the croc-o-dile business. and of course it fit. it would have fit 99.9% of the adult human population. it is that kind of costume. and my actress was as happy as i have ever seen a girl wearing 67 yards of green felt. compete with hoodie. and hands. and booties. 

once she was back in her regular uncroc clothes i walked her back to class. she was literally shaking while she talked about how wonderful the costume was. how great her part was. how the whole play was a dream wrapped in a vision draped with corybantic awesomeness. and i said to her, “i bet you are the happiest girl in this middle school today.” to which she responded with this little brightness of brilliance…

“i think i should be! it isn’t everyday that you get to try on a crocodile costume!”

and at that moment, i got it. the true meaning of contentment. and joy. or not hurrying toward some goal. the miracle of one everyday moment that was right now. as i held 49 pounds of felt crocodile costume in my hand. walking across an inner city magnet middle school basketball court with a teenage girl. who loves being a crocodile.

it is hard not to smile at this crocodile. despite captain hook's melodious warnings...

i actually had to stop walking. stop talking. stop her walking just so i could soak that moment in. and to really let it settle into my soul. and to stop the tears that burned my eyes. here was a girl who was loving EVERY moment of the process. she GOT TO (not “had to”) try on her costume. it was a joy. not just a step to go through to get to the BIG DAY. trying on the costume was THE BIG THING. and then coming to rehearsal was also A BIG THING. every moment was sacred. savored. every step was full of joy. 

i grabbed her hands and said, “you are so right. it isn’t every day that you get to try on a crocodile costume. let’s stand here and breathe in the awesomeness that is RIGHT NOW.” and she and i breathed. in the awesomeness. and the smell of the basketball court at an inner city middle school. and then we walked back to class. and i took that costume and hung it up so it would stay as wonderful and special as only 49 pounds of green felt can stay…

and every since that day i have tried to find a moment in the day, or several moments, that are crocodile moments… 

“it’s not everyday you get to work with 75 middle schoolers to make beautiful dramatic art.”

“it’s not everyday you watch your daughter fall in love with backstage tech work.”

“it’s not everyday you see your son's best childhood friend/former neighbor/cub scout pal become an eagle scout .”

“it’s not everyday you get to take 4 teenagers to disney world for a day.”

“it’s not everyday your college girl brings home a friend for spring break and they just enjoy hanging out at the house on the patio with the fire pit for hours.”

“it’s not everyday you get to hang out with an emmy winner at your house. and your kids think you are super cool because you are friends with him.”

every single moment is a REAL BIG moment on the path to the moments that we typically think of as the BIG moments… graduations, weddings, proms, parties, awards, birthdays, vacation, spring break, the actual performance of the play, when the play is over and life is back to “normal” (ha), whatever is the NEXT BIG THING that i think will be the thing that will make me happy. make things better. but there are hundreds, thousands, millions of moments along that way… that we “get to” experience that are the real joy of living.

because it’s not everyday that you get to try on a crocodile costume... nope, it is not. and i hope that i begin to get that a little bit more everyday. as i try to capture and breathe in all those moments that don't just have to happen everyday... but do happen... every. day. 

true greatness...

i loved this blog post stephen altrogge wrote about his grandfather. i think in my day to day social media hungry for viralness life that i need to remember these words...

“Despite his lack of public fame, my grandpa was truly great in God’s eyes. That’s the funny thing about true, biblical greatness. Biblical greatness almost never goes viral, because biblical greatness almost always involves doing things no one ever sees.” stephen altrogge, from “true greatness never goes viral”

doing things no one sees. or tweets. or instagrams. or facebrags (a facebook brag). or blogs about. or talks about later in a little aside to a friend. or oh so “humbly” mentions in passing. all of those are some of the ways i get in my props. ugh. 

true greatness. not letting my left hand know what my right hand is doing. much less not announcing it to the world via social media.

perhaps not counting up my “likes” (can i ever remember a time before we knew what “likes” were?) not evaluating the comments. or lack of comments. not explaining how busy i am. how important i am. because of all the “things” i do. for others. for God. for my family. how ever will i get over myself?

i am always returning to romans 7 and 8 as ballast for my soul. as encouragement that not all is lost. that there is hope. that SomeOne understand. perhaps that is why i read it so often this summer (like how i got that brag in about my constant Bible reading?) 

romans 7:21-23-25 (the message)

It happens so regularly that it’s predictable. The moment I decide to do good, sin is there to trip me up. I truly delight in God’s commands, but it’s pretty obvious that not all of me joins in that delight. Parts of me covertly rebel, and just when I least expect it, they take charge.

 I’ve tried everything and nothing helps. I’m at the end of my rope. Is there no one who can do anything for me? Isn’t that the real question?

 The answer,

thank God,

is that Jesus Christ can and does.

the only thing “true and great” about me is Jesus Christ. that's all i have to say about that today. and tomorrow. and into eternity. i am so indebted to the apostle paul. for penning those chapters in romans. but mostly indebted to Christ. who showed me that the greatest in His kingdom is those who never achieved it in this one...

taylor the latte boy responds...

here are a few highlights from dessert theater. and by "highlights" i mean "wonderful things maxx did." 

and in case you don't really understand the "taylor the latte boy responds" song, watch the video below it first. that is the "taylor the latte boy" song. which in our production was sung by an adorable high school girl named emma. instead of kristen chenowith. who is also adorable. but not a high school girl. nor a member of FBC tallahassee's youth group.

rosalea did wonderful things too. she was running the backstage. putting on scenery. microphones. handing out props. but it is difficult to video or take photos of backstage help.

dessert theater is a yearly occurrence at our church. and it is a HUGE pain during rehearsals and you think you will never survive the schedule. but you do survive. mostly. and in the end it is amazing. and the kids are fantastic. and the money raised goes to the youth mission/choir tour. and it is something all the kids that graduate talk about how much they miss being in it every year. and the parents that are finished with the marathons of dessert theater talk about how much they miss their kids being in it now. and i know i am coming to the last of my performers (though rosie may keep working her backstage magic.) and i know i will miss seeing him on stage also. mostly because he loves to be on stage so much (he got that from his mama.) but i have one more year...

beiber fever...

 so i don't usually write about pop stars... but since the biebs was arrested in my home state i feel very close to this story... ha.

and here is my 1 cent opinion (not really worth 2 cents). and it isn't even my own. i read it somewhere else and then moved on and later thought about how brilliant it was but i couldn't find it again to quote it from the source... but here is a synopsis of what i read...

once upon a time there was a very talented young man. who went to the big city. and did every kind of wrong thing there was to do. and his mother and his home church prayed for him. his name was augustine. st. augustine of hippo.

a guy who one day heard a voice saying “take up and read”. and he took up and read a book that would change his life. and mine. and he would write things that still move my heart today...

“Thou hast made us for thyself, O Lord, and our heart is restless until it finds its rest in thee.” 

“And men go abroad to admire the heights of mountains, the mighty waves of the sea, the broad tides of rivers, the compass of the ocean, and the circuits of the stars, yet pass over the mystery of themselves without a thought.” 

“You never go away from us, yet we have difficulty in returning to You. Come, Lord, stir us up and call us back. Kindle and seize us. Be our fire and our sweetness. Let us love. Let us run.” 

“You called and shouted and burst my deafness. You flashed, shone, and scattered my blindness. You breathed odors, and I drew in breath and panted for You. I tasted, and I hunger and thirst. You touched me, and I burned for Your peace.” 

“For great are you, Lord, and you look kindly on what is humble, but the lofty-minded you regard from afar. Only to those whose hearts are crushed do you draw close. You will not let yourself be found by the proud, nor even by those who in their inquisitive skill count stars or grains of sand, or measure the expanses of heaven, or trace the paths of the planets.” 

“Late have I loved you, beauty so old and so new: late have I loved you. And see, you were within and I was in the external world and sought you there, and in my unlovely state I plunged into those lovely created things which you made. You were with me, and I was not with you. The lovely things kept me far from you, though if they did not have their existence in you, they had no existence at all. You called and cried out loud and shattered my deafness. You were radiant and resplendent, you put to flight my blindness. You were fragrant, and I drew in my breath and now pant after you. I tasted you, and I feel but hunger and thirst for you. You touched me, and I am set on fire to attain the peace which is yours.” 

all quotes from a guy a lot like justin beiber who became a True Believer... Augustine of Hippo, Confessions

how to draw near...

in light of my last post this quote by clive staples seems most appropriate... (is there EVER a time when a clive staples quote does not seem appropriate? i have not found that time yet...)

We shall draw nearer to God not by trying to avoid the sufferings inherent in our lives, but by accepting them and offering them to Him; throwing away all defensive armor. If our hearts need to be broken, and if He chooses this as the way in which they should break, so be it. 
—C.S. Lewis 

trying to accept and offer all that is broken in my life to Him. so be it..