2 things are certain...

death and laundry...

so in the middle of my "things i know about death" series (which by the way is already a LOT of words and yet i only know ONE thing about death... "it hurts"), may i humbly submit a simple and sweet and thrifty nifty laundry blog post...

(and the crowd goes WILD with cheering...)


here is the recipe for lea's lovely & long lasting laundry detergent...

* 6 bars of feels-naptha soap. grated. i have heard that you can pulverize them in your fancy smancy food processor. i don't have one of those. so i grate them by hand. it took 10 minutes of my life. and one fingernail. and a band-aid.  

* 1 large box super washing soda (in the laundry aisle (all these ingredients except the baking soda are in the laundry aisle)

* 1 large box baking soda (from not the laundry aisle. it is the box that is around 5 lbs.)

* 1 large box borax (not pictured. but necessary)

* 1 large container oxy-clean

* optional and the most $ item... 2 containers of downy unstopables... buy them on sale. note that i had 3 for this batch. BECAUSE I AM ALL CRAZY LIKE THAT!!!

grate the soap. oh, i mentioned that. mix it all together. keep in a LARGE container (or separate into smaller container. whatever. i don't care. really, i have not a care in the world to how you store these but just do it in a way where it doesn't get wet. it gets clumpy then.) use a heaping tablespoon per load of laundry. it will not suds up. do not be alarmed by this unsudsyness. suds are a LIE SENT STRAIGHT FROM THE DEVIL to convince you that things are clean. suds do not = clean. cute boys who say "mam" do not always = nice boys. i know these things are true.

it should last for quite a while. we get 4-6 months out of it. depending on our filth level round these parts... and we have quite a high filth level.

another tip from my laundry room straight to your heart... add a cup of white vinegar to your washer (along with this powder) when washing towels or sheets. they will not smell vinegary. i promise this from the bottom of my heart and my laundry pile. they will be fluffy and lovely. and birds will sing and flowers will bloom and spring will spring.

another tip from the bottom of my dryer lint area straight to your heart... soak an old hand towel in fabric softener. let it dry. it will feel all weird and yet still strangely soft. do not let that deter you in anyway. throw it in with your items in the dryer (not your towels. they don't need fabric softening. they had the vinegar treatment.) then after your clothes come out. throw it in the next load. and the next and the next and about 10 loads later it won't feel weird and strangely soft. it will feel like a regular towel. it is done. soak it again. let it dry and get another dozen loads out of it. you won't have to buy fabric softener until the next election. the one in which i am running for president of the laundry room. VOTE FOR LEA. SHE WILL CLEAN UP ALL HER DIRTY LAUNDRY. CHEAP.