may be the MOST brilliant man EVER (and not just because he married me)....
i think he has a nefarious plan.
if i EVER ask him to go by the grocery store to pick up let’s say something simple like a gallon of milk or a loaf of bread... well, he searches the aisles of publix (and the SPECIAL MARKDOWN 75% OFF bins) for these kids of treasures and brings them home.
always claiming what an INCREDIBLE deal they were (uh, yeah honey, cause NO ONE BUT YOU is buying them).
and therefore i do not ask him to go to the grocery store again for a few months until the horror of the hannah montana cereal has faded in my memory. which will take a while because the memory of the FIVE boxes of “bill & ted’s excellent cereal” still cause a residual sugar rush...
and if you think i jest about the “bill and ted’s excellent cereal”... click to read the wikipedia entry about it. notice that it was manufactured by ralston purina, a company that makes DOG FOOD. it did exist, it was an incredible bargain, it resembled dog food, and we bought most of it...
“we” meaning ADAM...
it is all a part of his nefarious plan to NEVER have to go to the grocery store.
and now i am BEGGING you all with all that is in me to PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE if i die, find him a suitable wife within 10 minutes of my burial or my children will eat these kinds of things every day (and possibly for dinner too) for the rest of their lives.
really, i will not be posthumously mad at anyone who sets him up on a date EVEN AT THE MEMORIAL SERVICE if it meant that someone else would be going to the grocery and serving suitable breakfasts to my children.